Well Livvy, lately life’s been lousy And I know that you’re upset But life won’t get no better If you can’t learn to forget Cryin’ won’t bring John-Boy back, He’s out there on his own And I hope that he is happy, And I hope he don’t come home, Chorus ’Cause that’s one less mouth […]
Audience: Humor
My Secret
MY SECRET Cho: I’ve got a secret, how ’bout you? Let’s tell each other what we do! I’ve got a secret, how ’bout you? Friday night I’m feelin’ right, cause I get paid Right back to my little room, and I pull the shade Off with pants and quickly on with that dress I made […]
The L. A. Freeway Song
THE L.A. FREEWAY SONG Have you ever lost your way While you were driving through L.A.? And did you notice all the places That you passed along the way? Just take the first initial Of each turn you had to guess And you will have a word which will Describe Los Angeles! “H” is for […]
Garbage
GARBAGE Mr. Thompson calls the waiter Orders steak and baked potater Then he leaves the bone and gristle And he never eats the skin The busboy comes and takes it With a cough contaminates it Then he throws it in a can With coffee grinds and sardine tins A truck comes by on Friday And […]
Man Oh Man I Can
This was written before computers took up all our spare time. Relationships with inanimate objects might not be all that fulfilling, but they are sure less complicated, (ya think?) MAN OH MAN I CAN! Intro: As a window dresser at Macy’s My future held nothing in store Until that day in the warehouse When I […]
Country & Western Transylvania Love Song
COUNTRY & WESTERN TRANSYLVANIA LOVE SONG Bob Lincoln was a werewolf Now he lies beneath the ground With a silver bullet deep within his chest He was shot by Hattie Williams The tru’est lover ever found Tho’ she cried that night she sent him to his rest Cho: Howl to the moon Bob Lincoln, Howl […]
Doin’ It For You
Sometimes it’s a faster intervention to help someone change when we simply hold up a mirror so they can see for themselves some of the ridiculous positions they take. DOIN’ IT FOR YOU I treat you politely Baby, And so you can’t complain I hold the door when you go out An’ when you go […]
Junk Food Junkie
My old pal Larry Groce (Mountain Stage) wrote this one. He sings so beautifully that he figured this silly song was just a throw-away, but I got his permission to record it and when Dr. Demento started getting airplay with my version, … Larry went out and recorded it and got his first hit record! […]
Stuck On You
This song is about “huffing”. It’s got some funny lines in it, but “huffing” isn’t funny. We want to at least get the subject out on the table with kids so we can discuss the detrimental effects of getting dizzy by cutting down your brain oxygen. STUCK ON YOU Cho: Stuck on you, stuck on […]
A Porsche And A Potbelly
I got a Porsche and a potbelly It’s the great American dream I got a Porsche and a potbelly And someone t’keep ’em both clean! Now I ain’t lookin’ For times t’get lean I’m kinda fonda my mid-rift bulge And I love my machine! You all laughed at me back when My car was old […]